When you feel sad, go to the shower. Turn on the water as hot as it will go. The room must be steamy to set the mood. Imagine now there is a camera filming you at ground level, capturing your naked ankles as you step out of your pants. Get in the shower. The camera is now at face level. Turn your face up to the nozzle and let the water wash over you as you run your hands over your face and then hair, over the top of your head and to the nape of your neck. Hold your hands there for a moment, as if you were about to do a sit up. Depending on how self indulgent you are feeling, choose a character. You are Charlize Theron. You are Natalie Portman. Sit on the shower floor with your knees to your chest and your arms wrapped around yourself as mascara bleeds down your cheeks. Sob hysterically. You are Val Kilmer. You are Tom Cruise. Stay standing. Put both your hands against the wall of the shower, palms flat against the tiles. Rest your forehead on the back of your hands and cry quietly. Stay there until there are no tears left. When you are empty, the camera will be waiting by the tap handle to capture the moment your hand reaches over to shut off the water. Step out of the shower and wrap a towel around your waist or your chest without first drying off. You are you again. Go about your life as usual. These things never happened to you.

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